Last updated October 1, 2003
OK! Here's the scenario!
Kat ~ that's me ~ has discovered the Magic Wishing Well. Supplied with a number of pennies to toss in, she's already wished for wealth, health, youth, and staggering beauty. What next? How about a harem of guys with whom to share all those things?
If you haven't seen
my harem of animated men (and women), try here: ![]()
This, however, is the harem of non-animated men (and women) I would gather about me if I had the power of that Wishing Well. I couldn't decide who to put first, since the guys I'm hottest for tend to be the guys I've seen most recently, so they're in alphabetical order. This list is subject to change on any given day, too. What can I say? I'm fickle.
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Christian Bale Call me a cradle-robber, but I fell for this guy when he starred as Jim Hawkins in Treasure Island. I prefer to say that I saw droolworthy potential in that mouth even when he was just a lad. If you've seen American Psycho, then you know he's come a long way from Jim Hawkins! But he definitely did not disappoint my expectations. Certainly my favorite of his roles is Jack Kelly in Newsies, but a close second is Laurie in Little Women (what was Jo thinking of?!? Gabriel Byrne is fascinating and sexy, but to pass up Laurie for him? No way.)
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Sean Bean This is so bizarre. I actually disliked this actor until I saw him playing a character who I also disliked ~ Boromir of Gondor in The Fellowship of the Ring ~ whereupon I fell over in a lustful haze over both of them. Or rather, the combination. (The movie is great, don't get me wrong, but Sean is the major reason I've seen it so many times!) Since LoTR, I'm a fan. Good guy or bad, Sean brings a street-tough, sexy presence to every role.
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Ardeth Bey Don't get me wrong, I like Oded Fehr the actor, but he never would have caught my attention if The Mummy hadn't shown me how good a guy could look in a dress. Got to love the manly way he handles guns, too. I was thrilled that he got a good return role in The Mummy Returns, including lots of action stuff. There's something about a man with a sword... |
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Dirk Blackpool I'd better clarify that I am a slave to the beauty of Duncan Regehr in any role. But Dirk (the villain from the short-lived but hilarious spoof Wizards & Warriors) is special. Brilliant, witty, snide, arrogant, overwhelmingly masculine, with long soft dark hair, wearing all that leather... whew. It gets warm in the room when I watch him. And he has a huge sword, too. |
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Powers Boothe Intense, brooding, dominating, tall, dark, deep-voiced... this guy is compellingly sexy. Another of my prolific actors, he's an Emmy winner, but my favorite Boothe roles are in two "B" movies ~ as the burned out dedicated cop Mace Ryan in Rapid Fire and as the smooth-as-silk ruthless villain Joshua Foss in Sudden Death. Boothe is a Texas boy, and the remainders of his accent still make his voice sound like honey. |
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Marshall Sam Cain Sam is a character from a Western TV show I was nuts about, The Young Riders, played by the almost too-handsome Brett Cullen (another Texan). Sam wasn't exactly a mental genius, but he was an excellent marshall and a really nice guy. He was also sexy as hell ~ a tall, well-built, tousle-haired, squint-eyed Western lawman. Wow. |
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Spot Conlon OK, now I really am robbing the cradle. And I've never seen Gabriel Damon in any other movie than Newsies. But Spot is so cool and so tough, you have to love him. And he's got a mouth that, in sex appeal, rivals Christian Bale's. Plus those fascinating light eyes, and that attitude...! It makes me want to move to Brooklyn. |
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I don't have a picture, because
this guy is out of a book. Actually, a series of books dubbed the Lymond
Chronicles, by Dorothy Dunnett. I don't care a lot for the books ~ they
are well-written, but the late Ms. Dunnett had a real sadistic streak.
However, Francis himself has fascinated me for more than 30 years. He's
urbane, passionate yet controlled, multi-talented, complex, a rogue,
and brilliantly verbose with a tongue like a knife. As often as I've
read Game of Kings (where he's introduced, and my favorite of
the series), which is about 40 times, and as many fanfics as I've written
with him as a character (20+?), I never tire of him.
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Dar, the Beastmaster Marc Singer is a guy who should never wear clothes other than a loincloth. Of all the male bodies I've admired, this one is my favorite. The Beastmaster is a cool movie ~ cheesy, but lots of fun ~ but the major reason I watch it again and again is to see Dar. See him walk, run, fight... oh man. You should see him squat with that huge sword across his thighs. Pant pant. Heck, he even makes walking downstairs a sensual experience. (wiping palms) |
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Mr. Darcy I never have found Colin Firth attractive, but Firth as Mr. Darcy is another story altogether. That superior smugness melting away to an appealing boyishness, combined with the smouldering stares, and then tucked into Regency costume ~ I know some of the sex appeal has to come from the contrast between the buttoned-down, buttoned-up costumes and Darcy's own stuffy character and the surprisingly sensitive, sensual person they conceal at the beginning. Whatever! I don't know very many women who didn't go ga-ga over him, and I completely understand. |
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Brendan Fraser It took ages for this guy to grow on me. I kept thinking, "He's cute. I don't do cute." But his wacky expressions, gleeful sense of humor, and just the feeling that the guy is fun finally got to me. The Mummy Returns sent me over the edge, after which I checked out George of the Jungle and realized, "Hey, he's not only cute, he's sexy!" He still doesn't melt my knees, but I get a warm-fuzzy feeling every time I see him, and I love to watch him. And, hey, he's a Sagittarius like me! |
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Victor Garber I seemed to have changed my original impressions of many of the men in this harem, and Victor is definitely one of them. He always seemed to play the nice or hapless guy that nobody remembered once the movie ended. I knew who he was, but I was, like, "Eh." Then I saw him as Thomas Andrews in Titanic, where he got a chance to display some real emotion, including a memorable scene in front of a clock. Now he's got a role that shows he can be a tough and sexy guy (yes, really!) He's Jack Bristow, aka SpyDaddy, the father of Sydney Bristow on Alias. He's a dysfunctional dad and a really mixed-up husband, and definitely not someone you want mad at you. Jack brought me a new appreciation for Victor and got him into this harem.
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Scott Glenn He's been described in many places as "leathery," and as I've watched him over the years, I swear he's replaced every single ounce of what little fat he had into muscle and sinew, growing more lined and rugged each year. But this actor has always fascinated me. Love his voice, love his expressions, love the way he moves, awkwardly athletic. My favorite roles are as Cmdr. Bart Mancuso from The Hunt for Red October and as Emmet in Silverado, the movie where I first saw him. |
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Stewart Granger Suave, debonair, tall-dark-and-handsome, with a gorgeous smile, this early-Hollywood actor has been a favorite of mine since childhood, when I saw him in The Last Safari. He had an innate dignity as a young man which really came forward as he got older, and he never lost that dazzling smile or one iota of charm. But he was best as a swashbuckler, a role to which he brought humor, zest, physical dash and daring, and buckets of nice-guy charm. |
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John Gruden If anyone visiting here knows this guy, I'll be amazed. He's not an actor, musician, or anything like that ~ he's an NFL football coach. He used to be head coach of the Oakland Raiders, but recently switched to Tampa Bay. He's a favorite of the camera, with a range of expressions that gained him the nickname "Grimace Gruden" (the Raiders dubbed him "Chuckie" after the maniacal puppet). I love football, but whenever John is on the screen, I love it on an entirely different level. Sigh. |
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Haldir aka The Guardian of Lorien, from the first two films of Peter Jackson's Lord of the Rings. This guy makes a terrific entrance in FotR, and comes across as both competent and arrogant. He makes a splendid archer/captain/warrior in TTT, which is when I went from thinking of him as arrogant to thinking of him as sexy, but when I fell for him was the moment Aragorn gave him a great big hug. The startled expression on his face was priceless, and made him human. And oops, there went Kat, adding to her harem. |
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Tommy Lee Jones OK, he's got a face like 5 miles of bad road. But he's got a sexy smile, sharp expressive eyes, and a great body. Those alone don't keep me a fan, however. I adore him because he's just so much fun to watch! My favorite roles for him are the ones that take advantage of his rat-ta-tat-tat delivery of dialogue. He was the only really good thing in Fire Birds (worth watching the awful movie for); he switched marvelously between funny and menacing in Under Siege; and he complemented Harrison Ford beautifully in The Fugitive. To make it even better, he's also intelligent, and another Texas cowboy. |
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Jeroen Krabbé This Dutch actor puzzles me ~ how can a man who is so tall, dark and handsome, with such beautiful, expressive eyes, go almost unnoticed by movie fans? Maybe it's because it's so hard to spell his name? (It's pronounced Yer-roon' Krah-bay'.) I dunno, but I'm glad I found him. His roles have gone all the way from playboys (Crossing Delancey) to villains (The Living Daylights). He does sensitivity, too ~ his scene in Immortal Beloved with Isabella Rosselini is one of my favorite film moments. He even looks great in period costume (with a sword!) as the Baron Daguerre in Robin Hood. And I know everyone must remember him as the sophisticated villain from The Fugitive. The neat thing about this guy is that he brings a thoughtful depth to his undoubted sexiness. You're never in doubt that there is more to him than just a pretty face. |
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Ewan McGregor This guy has had such oddball roles, and he is so not-my-type, that I might never have seen his appeal... until I saw Moulin Rouge. I did a real double-take then! Those eyes! So lovely, sparkling, twinkling, full of humor and intelligence, exactly the kind of eyes I'd love to look into. I could live forever with a guy with eyes like Ewan's. He has a lot of other good qualities ~ he's an excellent actor, he sings charmingly, and he has managed to convince me that he is my favorite Star Wars character, Obi-Wan Kenobi.
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Inigo Montoya The Princess Bride is a movie jam-packed with great characters, but none better than Inigo. OK, his long locks don't compare to Ardeth Bey's, and he is far from gorgeous, but how can any woman resist that sweet, warm, passionate nature? Not to mention the brilliant swordplay. Yes, I love swords, but Westley didn't make me gawp at the screen when he fought. Besides, Inigo had a lot of the best lines! |
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Liam Neeson I never thought much of Liam Neeson from stills ~ after all, he does not have a pretty face. The first time I saw him in a film was, I swear, the role he was born to play, Qui-Gon Jinn in Star Wars I: The Phantom Menace. He was a wise mentor, a good man, but stubborn and fallible and warmly human. Many of his roles are like that, and he suits them, despite his boxer's features. I love his soft, melancholy eyes, especially. |
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Sam Neill This extremely prolific actor played a lot of bad guys (including the Devil himself), and although I acknowledged him as a terrific actor, I didn't like him at all until I saw him in Jurassic Park as Alan Grant. I adored the character and fell straight into lust with the actor. I've seen a lot of movies since then that I would never have watched if Sam wasn't in them! No matter what the movie, this clever, expressive and very human man is terrific. |
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Bill Paxton This guy made a living playing such jerks that it was hard to like him, but his hilariously idiotic role in Aliens made me take a second look, and seeing him in jeans and boots in Twister sealed my fate. He's a Texas boy, and Texas boys wear jeans and boots like nobody else can. There's a homebody, sweet sort of appeal to Bill. He's my boy-next-door. |
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Gregg Rainwater Here I go cradle-robbing again. But Gregg's half-breed character, Buck Cross, on The Young Riders was a very sexy young guy. Being a dark, brooding, long-haired outcast helps the effect, but Buck was also soft-spoken, sensitive, courageous, and often wise. My favorite of Gregg's roles is Buck, naturally, but I've liked him in everything else I've seen him in. |
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Alan Rickman When I watched Die Hard the first time, I kept wondering how that creepy, ruthless monster Hans could keep me glued to the screen, thinking he was... sexy. Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves showed me it wasn't a momentary aberration. I think Alan Rickman is sexy in every role he does. I have never seen scenery chewed in so magnificent a fashion as he did as the Sheriff of Nottingham, and then he can turn around and be soulfully romantic as Col. Brandon in Sense & Sensibility, then delightfully snide and sarcastic in Galaxy Quest. He's a terrific actor, and the only man who could make Severus Snape sexy.
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Sark The only reason that this guy is listed under his character's name rather than his real name (David Anders) is that I haven't seen David do anything else. Sark is a character in Alias, a ruthless, capably violent bad-guy henchman given so much depth by David's portrayal that his role has grown and continues to get more interesting. With his youth, rumpled hair, sharp wardrobe, and fascinatingly alive and humorous eyes, he doesn't seem evil, does he? Sark makes bad look good. In fact, he makes bad look downright sexy.
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Han Solo Oh, yes, I do love Harrison Ford, don't get me wrong. He's wonderful and sexy in everything he does. But if we're talking harems, Harrison is comfy ~ but Han Solo is everything else. Do you think I've watched Star Wars at least 40 times just to see spaceships and aliens? HA! I watch it to see the hottest, sexiest, most exasperating smuggler in any universe. I first saw him in the theater in 1977, when I was 25, and he redefined my idea of sexy. I've been in love with swashbucklers ever since. |
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Kiefer Sutherland Beyond the fact that he's another guy with a sexy mouth, he's got his dad's incredible screen presence. He comes across as intelligent, passionate, tough, yet sensitive and with a great sense of humor. My favorite roles for Kiefer are in Renegades, Young Guns, Flatliners, and Disney's The Three Musketeers, but I've never seen him yet in a role where I didn't like him. |
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Hamilton "Ham" Tyler This character from the second V movie and the series is played by Michael Ironside. Michael is not your typical sex object, but anyone who thinks I'm crazy needs to be introduced to Ham first. Ham's a soldier who takes over the rebels against their will but for their own good. He's tough as nails, a ruthlessly competent military leader, cynical, and a surprisingly funny, astringent counterpoint to all the goody-two-shoes of the rebels. Although he almost never bends from that tough-guy pose, he does have a soft spot for kids. |
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Bruce Willis Die Hard turned me on to two sexy men, Alan Rickman and Bruce. Going bald hasn't hurt this guy's looks, because his sex appeal doesn't rest with his hair. It's in that adorable, crooked smile. He's another one with a sexy mouth, and all he has to do is smile to melt me down. The street-tough presence, the great body ~ they don't hurt to look at. But it's that cute little-boy smile, with the bright twinkling eyes, that gets to me. |
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| The Women's Corner |
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Padme (Naberrie) Amidala Natalie Portman is a lovely young woman, but I'm not familiar with her, really. However, I love the character of Padme. Here is a woman who has it all. She's wise, responsible, strong-willed, ethical, humorous, and tolerant. She shoots straight and fights smart, and she fearlessly takes action when she must. Leia isn't much compared to her mom!
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Julie Christie When I was a teenager, I thought Julie was the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen. I might still hold to that position. Elegant, strikingly and sensually lovely, and with a hint of sadness in her eyes, she makes Sharon Stone look cheap and Julia Roberts look childish. |
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Jennifer Garner Despite all attempts to make her a vamp as Sydney Bristow in Alias, to me, Jen remains the "cute" one in this harem. Sure, she can kick *ss, but when she's not doing that, she's a sweet, affectionate woman, unpretentious despite being staggeringly beautiful, with a charm that is refreshingly natural. So nice is she, it took me a while to realize she can also be sexy, too! |
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Lucy Lawless No one can deny this multi-talented woman is hot as Xena: Warrior Princess. She's the kind of character I enjoy creating, an athletic master swordswoman and warrior with a heart and a sense of humor. After a few episodes, however, I realized that Lucy was a much better actress than I was expecting, not only in the physical role, but in the subtleties as well. I could sit for hours just watching her face change expression. And she has a gorgeously wicked smile, too. |
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Cherie Lunghi Sparkle, wit, and spirit ~ this lovely lady has them all, in spades. She's always a delight for me to watch. My favorite of her roles are her Shakespearean roles and the delightful Lady Elizabeth from Covington Cross, but I could watch her do anything and love every minute of it. |
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Lena Olin Class, style, charm, elegance, warmth, seductive sensuality, and more than a touch of danger... You need a lot of road signs to deal with this lady. She's got it all. About the only thing missing is sweetness, and for that, try chocolate. Lena is an under-appreciated actress who has found a worthy niche as the complex, intriguing, competent, devious, unpredictable... there I go with adjectives again. I mean, of course, Irina Derevko of Alias. She's a star even amongst that superb cast.
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Isabella Rosselini This is not your standard beauty, but she's... the only word I can find is luminous. She looks as if she's in soft romantic focus even when she isn't. And I have rarely seen a woman age into such beautiful dignity. |
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Patricia Velazquez Ms. Velazquez is the wonderfully vampish Anck-su-namun from The Mummy and The Mummy Returns. When I first saw her, I thought, "Oh, cool, a woman with a body rather than a bony stick!" She was actually just a teensy bit plump, in a lusciously curved way. She makes a great villainess, yet has a lovely, twinkling smile. I don't know why she fascinates me so, but if I were a guy, she would definitely be one of my lust objects. |
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Sigourney Weaver I think that if I really were a guy, and someone told me, "You can have any Hollywood woman you want," I'd keep this one. I guess part of the reason is that I identify with her best-known character, Ellen Ripley. (OK, I'm not quite that tough!) But part of it is her strong, unusual, elegant looks. And she can do anything, from action to drama to comedy. What a woman!!
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